Hang with me on the title here ... I will get to it eventually, I promise.
First off, let me tie up loose ends from last year. We did travel for Christmas up North to Northern MN to visit Jeff's family. It was challenging on some fronts as usual and once again pointed to the fact that I am entirely too serious and really need to work on letting things roll off my back. And I have once again made that my New Year's resolution ... along with doing sit-ups and running again.
Hmmm ... I wonder which of those three I will be successful at if any?!
We also as a family once again ALL had the flu over the week between Christmas and New Year's. Luckily it was about 24-36 hrs. a piece and we each had it a different day (whew!) But at some point as a mom, I protest saying, "HELLO?! we have done this EVERY year except for one since we've had kids for the past 7.5 years! At what point do we outgrow this?!" I was very thankful that we were able to make it to my mom's to celebrate between the sicknesses as well as to travel the 8 hours north in a car without anyone being sick AND that we've not spread the sickness to others amazingly.
We also were once again asked point blank if we were "going for the girl" this year. I really wonder if people realize what exactly they are asking. Isn't that kinda personal?!
Whatever. This is where I need to learn to let things roll off my back and since this is so often asked I should just know that people are curious and mean that in the best possible way. That they realize that it is something that we perhaps may wish we had ... but at some point I'd like people to just back off and realize that we're 40, my husband doesn't want to go there ... and it kinda is like an open sore on my heart. SO ... when asked that very poignant question this year while sitting in my MIL's living room... I just let it hang in the air uncomfortably and let Jeff answer it for once. It is after all his decision ultimately and yes, we are beyond deeply blessed with our three boys. To wish for anything more is, well ... selfish. And yet ... there it is in my little selfish heart. So, I was surprised to hear Jeff's answer this time.
"We might consider adoption at some point ... and if we did, it would most likely be for a girl--but it would be several years down the road, maybe in 3-4 years."
How strange. I had mostly abandoned hope.
And now I'm not sure what to think.
I like to hang on it ... but I'm also kinda tired too.
So, I'm just going to let it hang there uncomfortably in my mind ... teasingly ...
So, this year I think will be devoted to surrender and submission.
I keep coming back to that. I'm praying to spend more time in Quiet Time with God ...
which of course is always the answer.
But let me digress to the part about the "Giddy in 2011"
It would be great to have a bunch of "giddy" things happen in 2011 to look back on and say, "hey, what a theme!"
But, right now, let me showcase this beautiful line of fabrics from MODA that I will be making some skirts out of for Valentine's Day as soon as I finish the last few that I need to make from some pre-orders I received last year.
It's called "Giddy" and I just HEART this fabric line! (pun intended)
It is adorable and if you'd like a little twirl for your sweetie for Valentine's Day--drop me a comment or email and let me know your wishes.
Embracing a Traumaversary
10 hours ago